The trouble with the Onion is that it hits too hard:
Tom Cotton: "This attack never would have happened if the hammer hadn't been allowed across the border."
Rick Scott: "I find it absolutely disgusting that Nancy Pelosi has a husband."
Erik Bolling: “How many innocent people have to die before we realize that words do matter? Crazy people act on the crazy things they hear from politicians and celebrities. Oh shit, wait that was what I said on Fox after Steve Scalise got shot. Fuck. What I meant is that there is no connection between words and violence. Shit, shit, shit. Forget I said anything.”
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