Also the kid has vaulted straight into madolescence.
I picked her up from acting class at five today. "I need ice cream. Can we get ice cream?"
"PLEASE. I can't eat anything else, with these TEETH."
(She'd had her braces tightened at dawn, so she had a point.)
"Um," I said. "All right, I suppose. We can stop at Harp's. How's that?"
Giant grump. "Target?"
"Why Target?" Not that it actually mattered to me, but...
"They HAVE ice cream at Target."
"Well, yes, but."
"Plus I can get an Icee at Target."
I ruffled both hands through my hair. "I thought you wanted ice cream?"
"Now I want an Icee." We had reached the car and she growled at the door when it was locked. "A BLUE one."
Once we were in the car she cheered up, telling me how lovely acting class had been. The fun things that had happened. One of the kids who went to her Montessori school is in the class. The teacher is great. And so on.
At the actual Target it was cool -- I actually got her to buy shoes (I cannot tell you how amazing that is) and they were shoes on sale which we could afford (they were falling off the rack, and she could make a joke about shoes committing shoe-a-cide, plus they were a color she liked, so I think that helped) but -- on the way home --
Suddenly she was near tears.
"What?" I said, panicked. "What?"
"I want to fall in love," she said, mournfully.
"Jesus Christ," I said. "Galloping fuck biscuits. Are you serious?"
"I haven't had a crush on anyone in," she said, wiping at her eyes, "I don't know, forever."
"Where did that come from?"
"I was sad about it before," she said, and slurped some Icee, "but the Icee distracted me."
"I'ma kill you," I said. "I'ma kill you, I'ma stuff you, I'ma drag you behind me on wheels."
"No, you won't," she said, and offered me some of her Icee. A green one. They were out of blue.