NEW SOVIET DOG SPIKE DIES
ITAR-TASS – 5 October 2012 The Politboro of the People’s Democratic Republic of Burgh today announced with great sorrow the death of Spike, a hero of the PDRB, a winner of the Order of Burgh, and a New Socialist Dog.
Spike was born under the remorseless heel of capitalism, abandoned to the depredations of the streets, where he was recruited for the Party. After a period of education, Spike joined the Young Soviet Dogs where he distinguished himself in the Great Patriotic Struggle against the Fascist Cable Installers whose invasions plagues the PDRB in the early days.
A remorseless foe of the paper tigers of the US Postal System, Spike also fought the toadies of UPS and their lickspittles Fed-EX with such a vigor and adherence to socialist ideals that he was awarded the Order of Burgh on May Day, the highest honor for a New Socialist Dog.
Spike lived a long and fruitful life, finally succumbing to old age. Even at the last, Spike bared his fangs at those who sought deliver Capitalist mail. His motto: Bark, Bark, Bark will be engraved on his tomb in Burgh Square.
Those wishing to honor Spike’s memory should report to their local party headquarters where recruiting for the Spike Shock Workers Brigades are forming to implement a five-year plan to increase wheat and steel production in the central provinces.
A remorseless foe of the paper tigers of the US Postal System, Spike also fought the toadies of UPS and their lickspittles Fed-EX with such a vigor and adherence to socialist ideals that he was awarded the Order of Burgh on May Day, the highest honor for a New Socialist Dog.
Spike lived a long and fruitful life, finally succumbing to old age. Even at the last, Spike bared his fangs at those who sought deliver Capitalist mail. His motto: Bark, Bark, Bark will be engraved on his tomb in Burgh Square.
Those wishing to honor Spike’s memory should report to their local party headquarters where recruiting for the Spike Shock Workers Brigades are forming to implement a five-year plan to increase wheat and steel production in the central provinces.
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