Saturday, September 30, 2023

Midnight Pals

If you're not following bitterkarella on tumblr, what are you even doing with your time?

Here's her latest:

Midnight Pals: The Running Grave

[mysterious circle of robed figures] JK Rowling: hello children Rowling: i have a new ssstory for you tonight Rowling: a new ssstory of cormorant ssstrike Jesse Singal: wow mommy it's great! Maya Forstater: the greatest story ever told Rowling: Rowling: well i haven't told it yet

Helen Joyce: i'm not exaggerating when i say that this is 100% the best story ever written in human history Rowling: you haven't heard it yet Joyce: i don't have to hear it to know it's better than any other story in the world Rowling: Rowling: oh

Joyce: i don't need to know anything about it or even hear it to say that jk rowling is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I've ever known in my life Rowling: Rowling: i dunno Rowling: for sssome reassson thisss jussst isssn't ssatissfying

[midnight society] JK Rowling: hello children Rowling: i have a new cormorant ssstrike ssstory Barker: don't you have your own group to tell that to? Rowling: no all they do isss praisss me and tell me i'm great Rowling: it getsss tiring Rowling: you all wouldn't underssstand

Rowling: sso cormorant strike is an ugly detective with a terrible personality who also reeksss of cigarettess and fartss conssstantly and also his hair lookss like pubess Rowling: naturally the women are all hungry for hiss D Patricia Highsmith: crazy dames, who can fathom them

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