General Motors' decision today to stop manufacturing Hummers has struck at the heart of the group who loved the vehicles most: America's assholes. Across the nation, leading assholes spoke of a sense of loss and sadness caused by the decision, and suggested that they would now be searching for new ways to compensate for their small penises.
11 minutes ago
5 comments:
My husband's comment: "The only thing that would make me happier is if each Hummer already in existence blew up, with its owner inside."
Your husband is my kinda fella!
This news made my morning. The first thing I think when I see one of those go by is "Oh look, an asshole is out today."
It pisses me off to see someone driving a Hummer, and thinking that the jerk in the driver's seat probably imagines everyone envies him ticks me off even more. I'm glad they are going out of existence.
I am very happy that these beasts will no longer be made. It is one thing for an explorer, rancher, etc. to need a tough, rough country vehicle - but the Hummer H2, H3 etc. were just a 4-wheel drive pickup truck with a "Pimp My Ride" body on it.
The only vehicle which might qualify for serious professional use is a de-milled Army or Marine Corps unit.
My guts always cramped to see the GM "Hummers" on the road.
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