Friday, October 17, 2008

Right-Wing Radio Mmm!

Took the kid to the denist for an emergency tooth extraction (the state of dentistry in Pork Smith, ai, where we have no fluoride in our water, since to put fluoride in our water, as we all know, that would be a commie plot, and Jesus doesn't want socialism, he wants us to take personal responsibility for brushing our teeth and paying huge dental bills when they rot in our heads anyway, I think that's how the argument goes)...

Where was I?

Kid had an abcessed tooth, abcess under one of her many fillings, so I took her to the dentist at 7:00 a.m. this morning. Like most of the dentists in Pork Smith, this one is an Evangelical Christian. We love her anyway, she's a great dentist, great with the kid, who, as I might have mentioned, is just the smallest bit neutrotic, especially when it comes to matters of medical care.

Anyway, dentist talked her down off the ceiling and got the tooth out, it was practically painless.

BUT: while we were waiting in the waiting room and I was threatening the kid with baby Xanax if she didn't stop spinning in circles, the Christian radio station that is played over the sound system at the office broke off their inspirational songs for a moment ("Je-esus wilsave you! Hee --has the pow=r!") to give the weather and chat about the news.

"Now I didn't watch the debates," said male dj. "Did you, Honey?"

Honey hadn't watched the debates, either.

"But I keep hearing about this Joe the plumber. Who's the Joe the Plumber?"

Honey very sweetly says she has no idea.

Neither DJ is familiar with the operation of the Google I guess. They turn to a third expert, who has consulted some outside source.

"Well," he says, with the fatherly voice of one Who Knows All, "Joe was a concerned small business owner at an Obama rally. He was worried because Obama's tax plan is going to raise his taxes. Obama told him that it was better for everyone if we spread the wealth around, and McCain used this comment during the debate."

"Ah," said male dj. "Well, that makes things a lot clearer! From what I was hearing on CNN last night, I was thinking Joe the Plumber was made up! Like a unicorn that McCain kept under his bunk in a magic box!"

"Yes!" chirped Honey. "That's much clearer!"

Then they went to another song about Jesus.

Why is the Christian Right so ignorant? There you go!


Bardiac said...

When I was a kid, the orthodontist my folks sent me to was really conservative, and always had conservative talk radio going. It was vile to have to go sit there and listen to what a great man Nixon was and blah blah.

On the other hand, I can't imagine a much more dismal job than putting braces on kids and adjusting them all day. (Now I almost feel sorry for the guy.)

delagar said...

This dentist -- everyone at this office -- the kid and i love. They're wonderful with the kid, wonderful at getting her through the procedures (and she really is a phobic howler monkey in the dentist's office), extraordinarily patient with my tiny patient; also they appear to actually like her -- talk to her like a human, remember things about her, ask after her when they see me on the streets.

Which said, and all that, they also have the far-right world view: they only known what they have been told by these radio stations, by their churches, by one another. The surge is working. Global climate change isn't real. Christians are being persecuted in the country. Barack Obama wants to kill babies, and tells lies, and doesn't care about America.

And, here in Arkansas, they're over half of our votes -- well over half.