So I wake up from the anesthesia, always my least favorite part of this whole deal, the waking up from the anesthesia part (my favorite bit is when the anesthesia doc says, Now I'm going to give you this shot in your IV, it'll make you feel really nice, boy do I love that bit), and the nurse comes over and does the whole, breathe for me, honey bit, I hate that bit, and as soon as I'm done coughing and swearing at her I ask, "Is everything all right?"
And she says, "The doctor will be along to talk to you soon."
Fuck, I think. Because, usually? It's never good when the nurses won't tell you things.
But this time it was (I won't torment you further). This time, the doctor comes buzzing by, talks to me for all of six point three seconds, but says the words I always, always want to hear, specifically, "No tumor," adds, "Big old kidney stone, we'll need to deal with that, and an inflamed valve, see you in a week or so," and buzzes away.
So I get to live. At least for awhile longer.