Saturday, November 15, 2014

The Annual Winter Argument in the delagar Household Has Commenced

You get all kinds of advice, y'all, on how to have a happy marriage (Huffington Post says there are Thirteen Secrets to a Happy Marriage; WebMD says just two -- Be Nice and Don't Nitpick).

I am here to tell you there is one and only one true bone of contention in the Long Term Relationship.

It's the thermostat.

Y'all need to find someone whose blood runs at the same speed as your own.

Seriously, don't even mess with this one.  You can negotiate a way to get the dishes done.  You can figure out how to pay the bills.  Children or no children, well, that's serious too, I agree, and probably a deal-breaker, but you'll handle it.

On the other hand: this morning I woke up and he had the thermostat at 74.

Seventy-four, people!

"What the shit, Dr. Skull!" I shouted.

He re-adjusted his headphones and turned the volume up on his fretless bass.  (This is what I mean by negotiation, y'all.  He loves to get up at three a.m. and play his guitars.  His electric guitars.  Loudly.  We found a way around the problem.  Through it is true that a new problem -- for me, at least -- ensued.)

"Take off the earphones!  I know you can see me talking!"

"Are you making coffee, Boo-boo?" he shouted over the music.  "Will you make some for me?"

"It's 80 degrees in here!" I shouted back.  "Why did you put the heat so high!"

"I wrote a new song!  Do you want to hear it?"

I stomped off to put the heat on 55.  Which is where it should be.  People aren't meant to be baking in the middle of winter! (Of course I'd also like the house to be at about 55 in the middle of summer, but that's another argument.)

I also made him some coffee, because I'm a good wife.

About an hour later, he came wandering out from his Man Cave, looking disgruntled.  "It's freezing in here.  What did you put the heat on?"

"Wear your slippers," I said sweetly.  "It's the middle of winter."



6 comments:

nicoleandmaggie said...

This works out really well for DH and me. I need it much warmer than he does and he generates heat. I get super cuddly in the winter. Last night he was super-amazingly thoughtful-- he had heated up my beanbag neck warmer and put it in the bed for my feet. When I got into bed last night instead of the cold unhappiness I'd been expecting, my feet warmed up right away! I have the best husband ever.

delagar said...

D'aw! That's so sweet!

Fie upon this quiet life! said...

55 is freezing!! 74 is hot! I'd rather be cool than hot, but 55 is way too cold for me. I like the thermostat at about 68-70 year round.

delagar said...

55 is perfect! 68 and I'm cooking.

We compromised on 62 today, which had neither of us exactly happy. :)

Dame Eleanor Hull said...

Sir John likes cold. I hate being cold. But I also hate paying enormous heating bills, so I'm all wrapped up in layers of wool and fleece, with the heat at 65, and then he worries about it being cold in our drafty old house. We had the attic re-insulated after last winter. Now we're figuring out what comes next. Sadly, I don't think it's going to be moving to California. Windows?

Whitney P. Johnson said...

we keep ours somewhere just above 70, but we also have reptiles in the house, and while they have heating pads, ambient temps are very important to them not freezing and dying... plus, I like to be comfortably warm during the winter... where I can wear a tank top or long sleeve shirt depending on my mood.

Also, the cats like the heating vents when they are blowing warm air.