So it's the fifth night of Hanukkah, and my kid got some Walkers Liquorice Toffee bars for her present.
We had latkes and fish sticks for dinner (not actually an authentic traditional Hanukkah meal, although I do make the best latkes*) and afterwards she lay on the sofa chewing on a toffee bar and reading one of the books she got for yesterday's present.
"Aaargh!" she cried presently. "This sticks to my back teeth!"
Me: "Yes, that is the problem with toffee."
The Kid: "But what do I do?"
Me: "You just have to suck it off."
The Kid: "Hee hee."
The Kid: "Hee hee. Suck it off."
4 potatoes, peeled and grated by hand with one of those tin graters. Don't use a food processor, is what I'm saying.
About a cup of Matzo meal
Either one grated onion or five or six tablespoons of onion powder
A bit of salt
Grate the potatoes, storing the grated mass in a bowl of cold water to cover as you go. When you're done grating, dump that water (be careful not to lose the grated potato) and refill with fresh cold water. Cover bowl with Saran wrap and store in fridge for at least an hour, and as long as seven or eight.
When you're ready to start cooking, drain and rinse and squish the grated potato -- get as much water out of it as you can. Put grated potato in a large bowl. Break the eggs in, dump in the Matzo meal, add the onion and salt, and mix up thoroughly. Just use your hands. You're gonna be using them in a minute here anyway.
Get out your largest cast iron skillet (or whatever big frying pan you have) and heat some peanut oil. When it's hot enough, form your potato mix into flat thin patties about as round as small hamburgers but MUCH thinner (try to get them as thin as you can). Fry until crisp and brown on both sides. Drain on paper towels. Repeat until you're out of mix.
Eat, traditionally, with sour cream or applesauce. I eat mine with ketchup, which appalls Dr. Skull.